A Series of (Un)fortunate Events
by Ajalea
Summary: When food critic Sanji visits the coffee shop Zoro works at, the green haired man is afraid something will go so terribly wrong, he will never live it down. And it does goes wrong, but in a whole different way then both would have expected. My piece for the ZoSan Coffee Shop AU project on Tumblr :) It totally open for any critique, so please, be my guest


**Soooooo, here's my piece for the ZoSan Coffee Shop AU :D It took me a while to get here, but in the end, I am quite proud of myself ^^ Anyway, this still needs a tiny bit of editing, but you can already go and give my any tips to improve what you're reading here. I would very much appreciate that :3  
>By all means, enjoy~<strong>

* * *

><p>Zoro knew the moment that person came in what was going on. That guy had picked the exact day his boss wasn't around. He looked around. Luckily it wasn't very busy in the coffee shop, Zoro sighed mentally, and there were only the two regulars in their usual corner, not taking notice of anything that happened outside their space.<p>

The new customer sat down at a random table, but with a good view of the shop, taking out a small notebook and a pen. Zoro looked one last time at the paper he was reading just a moment before, eyeing the article with the review of one of the best restaurants in town. The one who wrote the article was also the one to judge the food and today he apparently had decided to visit the coffee shop where Zoro was working. The coffee shop employee straightened his back and put on the best customer friendly face that he could manage. Carefully, he approached the food critic, trying to not act too nervous. If he screwed this up, his boss would certainly kill him.

"Good morning, sir. Can I take your order?" It sounded as politely as Zoro could say it.

The other guy looked up from his notebook, pointing his eyes at Zoro, or rather, his eye. Latter seemed not to notice the spark in the eyes of the other that appeared when they looked at each other, he could only look at the appearance of the guy. Just like the photo that was next to the article, 'Sanji' (it could be a fake name as far as Zoro knew) was wearing a nice fitting suit and was gifted with shiny blond hair, covering one of his eyes. Rumor had it that Sanji once got a chef too angry and he received a fork in his face, making him lose his eye. Ever since then he covered the damaged part of his face, so nobody could look at it anymore. Above the visible eye Zoro could see an eyebrow, with its tiny blond hairs moving in a spiral on one end. It amazed the barista. He turned back to reality, keeping off the staring at that one blue eye and weird eyebrow, and hoped the blond hadn't ordered anything yet.

Sanji sighed slightly, shifting his eyes from Zoro to the menu. "I'll take that coffee you seem to be famous for and a piece of those strawberry cheesecakes I saw on the counter."

Zoro nodded, writing everything down. "Certainly sir, coming right up." He turned around and started to grind the coffee beans. Meanwhile he thought about the voice the blond critic spoke with. It had a nice, smooth ring to it, like the soft frosting on a cupcake. Within a few minutes the barista had produced a damping cup of nice smelling coffee and a good-looking piece of cheesecake on a plate, ready to serve.

Sanji barely looked up from his writing when Zoro put down the coffee and the cake. With a quick look he couldn't see clearly what the blond was writing. The hand writing was too small, even kind of neat, but unreadable from this distance. With nothing else to do, Zoro walked to the couple in the corner, asking if they wished for anything else. The man answered he wanted another cola, the woman asked for her third coffee. The moment Zoro turned his back on them, they already had no eyes for him anymore, only for each other, so he returned to his place behind the counter where he noticed from the corner of his eye that the blond was watching him. Zoro breathed slowly, not giving away how nervous he really was. To distract himself, he grabbed the paper he was reading before, putting on his reading glasses, though he skipped the article Sanji had written. For a few minutes Zoro's world existed only of all the wars and fighting and disasters going on in other parts of the world. After finishing the paper, the green haired man grabbed some cups, deciding to clean them, though that wasn't necessary at all. Time slowly passed by and Zoro was bored.

He decided to approach the critic.

"Is everything alright, sir?" He asked, standing at the right side of the guy. Sanji looked up to answer, but before he could say anything, the bell ringed as the door opened. Zoro knew exactly who had just come in. It was Luffy, the only person who could eat everything in this shop in just a few hours. He tried once, a few years back, though he had to stop because Zoro's boss found out the boy had no money. Ever since then, every now and then, he came by, eating more than a normal human being could eat in a day. For a price, of course. In return Luffy washed the dishes before he left and surprisingly he was doing a fine job.

"Yo Zoro, I'm back." Zoro heard the grin on Luffy's face. That wasn't very hard to tell, he was always smiling. He began moving around to greet the newcomer, but the boy already stormed past him, bumping into him in the process. That caused Zoro to fall over. To ease the shock, he grabbed the back of Sanji's chair with one hand, though couldn't help but crashing into Sanji's face with his own. With his mouth. Of course.

Zoro's eyes widened for a moment from the shock, then he quickly pulled away, not being able to prevent a small kissing sound to be heard. He also wasn't fast enough not to see the almost invisible line of saliva between his mouth and the other's. Creating a big gap between them, Zoro tried to speak, but could only stutter.

"Oh m-my god, I-I am so-so sorry-y." He blushed, adding to his awkwardness, along with putting one of his hands up in the air and he brushed with the other through his green hair.

Sanji blinked a few times too with his one eye, aside from his surprise nothing showed on his face. After a moment, he finally spoke.

"Hmm, mint. This was the best taste I had all day. Pretty refreshing." Sanji said, lost in thought. A small smile appeared on his face. This made Zoro even redder. He cleared his throat, regaining his posture a little.

"No really. Let me make this up to you." He spoke hastily. "Without any charge of course, this was as much my mistake as," Zoro turned for a second to stare at the speed devil that had just come in, causing all this trouble, "his."

"If you insist, I must take your offer. A regular coffee then, please." Sanji's smirk grew wider for reasons unknown to the green haired man.

Zoro nodded, letting the critic know he got it. When he turned around to grab what he needed to make his special coffee, he unconsciously licked his lips. Only then he realized they had a light sweet taste, still lingering from the kiss he accidentally had shared with Sanji. The cause of the sweetness was probably the cake he had served the blond.

As quickly as he could, he prepared Sanji's order. It didn't go as fast as Zoro wanted, as he was still a bit in shock of what happened just moments before and his hands shook a little. When he walked around the counter, Zoro was careful not to drop the coffee. Too bad he was too much focused on the coffee that he didn't see a chair standing in his way. Without any delay, Zoro almost fell over for the second time that day, but this time, not he fell over the critic, but the coffee did. Zoro froze in pure horror. Sanji's face only looked shocked (again), not angry or anything, just shocked. Luckily, Zoro had a towel in the apron tied to his waist and he used it to try to dry the brown stains on the critic's shirt, without saying a word. Like an idiot, he worked his way up until he reached a certain face. With much care, Zoro touched the other's face with the towel, which was actually already drenched in hot coffee so Sanji winced a bit at the touch. The green haired man noticed and stood to grab a clean one, but was stopped when a hand grabbed his arm, just above his elbow.

"Are you normally that clumsy, mosshead?" It sounded behind Zoro, mockingly.

Zoro huffed and smiled awkwardly. "No, usually not." He turned again, facing Sanji, who also stood. "Please follow me, I'll get you a change of clothing." While he said it, he racked his mind where he could find a clean shirt and maybe even pants. They walked into the kitchen, where Luffy was ransacking the food supply. It made Zoro sigh deeply and without putting any more thought into it, he grabbed the boy and shoved him outside into the shop itself.

"Watch the shop for me, Luffy." Zoro demanded. "If you do, I'll get you meat." He added, knowing that would work.

Luffy nodded with a grin. "Yosh! I'm gonna watch the shop!" Before he could say anything else, Zoro had already closed the door. He looked at the stained shirt sticking to Sanji's body.

"Take off your shirt." Zoro held out his hand as if the blond had already taken it off.

"I beg your pardon? Kinda blunt, aren't we now?" Even with the brown stains still on his face and shirt, Sanji apparently didn't want to part from his clothing. Now that he wasn't in the shop itself anymore, he also didn't really have the whole 'critic' attitude anymore.  
>Zoro ignored the flirt, his face still seriously concerned, his nervousness completely forgotten. "You're not gonna gain anything from keeping wearing that, you know. If you're not going to do anything, I'll take it off for you." He moved up to Sanji to prove that he meant what he was saying.<p>

"Alright, alright, give me a minute." The blond put his hands up in defense. Zoro stopped approaching and Sanji moved his hands to the top button of his shirt. Slowly, Sanji opened up the stained shirt, revealing a pale chest. Zoro even would have appreciated the sight if Sanji's skin didn't have some really concerning spots that had an alarming red color.  
>"Ouch, that looks painful. We should definitely cool it." Before Sanji could react, the green haired man already turned to a cabinet and opened a drawer to find clean towels. He grabbed a bunch of them and threw them in the cleanest of two sinks, opening the water tap. He waited a few moments so that the towels could drench in water. Zoro picked one of them up, squeezed it a bit, and then put it on Sanji's shoulder. The critic's face changed from a concerned expression to a pained one.<p>

"I'm really sorry, but it'll hurt more later on if I don't do this." Zoro tried to apologize.

Sanji gritted his teeth. "Too close." He muttered under his breath.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" Zoro pretended like he didn't hear those two words. He didn't understand why Sanji said that.

"I can do this myself. No need to touch me." Sanji huffed, avoiding the of being distant, the critic was now maybe even implying that Zoro was flirting with him and he was being distant. The barista shook his head at the first thought, only to stop and ask himself a question. Had he been flirting with the blond?

To bring his mind to other thoughts, Zoro came up with an idea. "Here, take these." He handed Sanji the drenched towels. "I'll get you some clean clothes. Wait here for a bit." The blond didn't protest, only covered himself in the cold, wet towels Zoro got him. After the tingling pinches of pain, Sanji could only feel relief. The coffee, which was supposed to be served hot, was in fact very hot, so the coldness of the wet towels was very welcome.

Meanwhile Zoro searched through a locker in the back corner of the kitchen. It was a strange place to look for spare clothes, but the barista found some, because he knew they would be there.

Sanji's body was all wrapped up in towels now, as far as he could managed himself. Luckily, his back was still unhurt, so Zoro didn't have to help him with cooling it. Before Sanji could protest, Zoro lifted the towel on Sanji's shoulder, to see how bad it was. The barista decided it was okay to remove the towels.

"Here, put this on." Zoro tossed the other some clothing. It was a plain white shirt and some black pants in case Sanji's own were coffee-stained too. Zoro was too unsure to ask about the pants. The blond tried the shirt on, frowning at the size. "Just whose are these?" He asked, grabbing the shirt to get a better look at it. It definitely was oversized for Sanji, but at least the shirt was clean.

"Mine actually. It's just my normal clothing." Zoro looked at Sanji as if he was a judge on a famous TV show. "It might be a little bit too big for you, but it's just for a short while, so you're going to have to deal with it at the moment. Plus, I couldn't find anything else." He shrugged.

It was quiet for a moment.

"No, I… like it. Thank you." Sanji mumbled, hoping Zoro wouldn't hear him. He underestimated the green haired man's hearing capabilities though. Zoro heard, but chose not to react.

Neither spoke for a few minutes. Zoro began to feel himself being awkward standing there, saying nothing, so he agreed with himself in his mind that he still owed the** critic** a coffee. Quietly, he left Sanji alone for a moment. He walked through the door which said 'shop', immediately searching for the two other costumers and Luffy. None of them were still present. It occurred to Zoro that maybe Luffy had scared the couple away and then left himself, being bored and all. Zoro couldn't care less. At least he could close the coffee shop for a while now, no one was coming in for a cup of coffee around this time of day anyway. Just to be sure no one would come in, Zoro locked the door and changed to sign to 'Closed'. After that, he prepared coffee for Sanji and himself.

Zoro returned with two mugs of steaming coffee and placed them both next to the blond, with steady hands. Sanji snorted, like he wanted to say 'at least you could get it right the second time'. There were no chairs in the kitchen, so both leaned against the counter, next to the sinks.

"So, now what?" Zoro dared to ask after a long silence. After finishing his own coffee, he washed his hands and dried them with the last dry towel he could find. The rest was all used to cool the burned parts of the blond's skin.

Sanji took a sip from his coffee while he thought about it. "I dunno." He finally replied, shrugging.

That caused the green haired barista to get a little bit angry. "Alright, then I'll just wait for you to write a shitty article about this place, so that my boss could fire me. Great." The sarcasm was clearly audible in that last word.

"Why would I give you a bad review?" The critic frowned confused.

Zoro could only stare. "What do you mean 'Why would I give you a bad review'? Look at what I did to you! That must be reason enough to get me fired, if not worse."

Sanji laughed and this time it sounded like he meant it. "I have no reason to let your boss fire you, or to give this coffee shop a bad review. The coffee tasted nice, this one was even better than the first." He pointed at the now empty mug. "Besides, you did all you could to make up for the mistakes made today and I don't mind half of what happened as much as you think I do."

"I still don't get it."

"You still don't? Let me reveal the anticlimax for you then." Sanji moved to face Zoro. The barista pulled up an eyebrow, waiting for the other to continue.

"Well, if you really want to know why I'm here, it's not for critiquing coffee. I'm a restaurant critic, y'know."

Zoro could smash his hand through his head. Of course he'd jumped to conclusions the moment Sanji had entered the coffee shop. He tried to keep his voice calm.

"Then why were you here?"

Sanji shrugged. "Someone told me about this café, that a really good looking guy worked here, so I thought I'd check it out." He said it nonchalantly, but his smirk gave him away.

"Wait a minute. So you're saying you came here for someone? Who? There are three different guys working here, and then there's the boss…" Zoro started, but Sanji cut him off.

"Oh you numbskull! Could you get any more stupid?" Sanji was almost shouting. "Why don't you get it? I came here for you!" Sanji stopped caring what Zoro would answer and grabbed the barista's head with both hands. The kiss that followed was intense, especially on Sanji's part. He almost forced his tongue into Zoro's mouth, but with a lot of mental strength he could withhold himself. With all his frustration thrown into the first few seconds of the kiss, Sanji pulled away soon after he realized what he was doing.

This time it was Zoro's turn to be surprised. Very surprised. He would never have thought Sanji would be there for him. _Him_ of all people! When Zoro didn't react, the critic panicked.

"Okay, you know what? Forget it. Please say thanks to that boy – what was his name? Lucky? – for giving me this opportunity. From now on, I'll stay out of your life if you want from now on." Sanji turned to leave, not wanting to look at Zoro's face any more than he did already.

"Wait." Sanji froze at Zoro's demand, but he didn't turn around.

Zoro hesitated about what he was going to say. "I'll uhm… I'll wash your clothes, so please come back to pick them up." He awkwardly brushed through his hair, something Sanji couldn't see.

The blond looked down only to realize again he was indeed wearing Zoro's shirt. "Right." Then he finally turned around. "What's your name again?" Sanji tried to ignore the possible invitation for a second meeting and focus on the person in front of him.

"Zoro." There was nothing wrong with a short answer.

"Well then, Zoro, till next time we meet." Zoro was avoiding eye contact, with a red flush still present on his face. Sanji understood it was probably best to leave the guy alone for the moment. He had a reason to come back after all. He walked to the door leading to the shop and heard the barista mumbling something behind his back.

"… Yeah, till then." It made Sanji blush. No way in hell Zoro would ever get that shirt back.


End file.
